I'm Not Being Funny
by Haras Railfcm
Summary: The story of Allan a Dale, from before he met Robin, through the first two series, & beyond. Ever wonder why he is such a compulsive liar? What he was thinking in Series 2? And are you unhappy with the end of Series 2 & 3? Than this story is for you!
1. Introduction

**Hello readers! I'm excited that I finally got a new idea for a story. I am sick of how Series 3 is going, so I'm combining the actual legend of Robin Hood with my own ideas and creating this story. I thought it would be interesting to hear the story from the view of Allan a Dale, because of all he goes through. I would also like to hear not only your reviews, but things you wish to know about this character, and how you would like the story to go. I am up for suggestions. I'm hoping they will inspire me further. I want to learn from my readers and know what they like in a fanfiction. Also, if you see anything that should be edited (I still make mistakes, despite Spell Check), please let me know. This is the hardest story I've had to write, since it is based off a legend, which in turn was based off an actual time period and place in history. If you see anything that is inaccurate, please let me know as well. I hope you enjoy the introduction, and please review!**

**Thanks,**

**Haras**

* * *

"Luke! Luke!" cried a young man as he ran towards the stables.

"Nathaniel! What is it? What's happened?" replied his friend, looking up from where he stood, grooming a horse. "But for Heaven's sake man, stop shouting!" he scolded. "You'll spook my horses!"

Nathaniel reached the stable and leaned against the wall, panting.

"It's Anna, Luke," he panted. "The baby is coming."

Luke nearly dropped his comb. "Now?!" he gasped.

Nathaniel nodded. "My Laura is with her now, and sent her apprentice to fetch some water. She saw me on her way to the well and said I'd better get you because the baby is coming!"

"Thank you, my friend," replied Luke as he turned to his own apprentice. "Paul, please continue the work. I shall return later."

His apprentice nodded, and Luke and Nathaniel ran to a small house in the middle of Rochdale.

Once inside the house, all the two men could do was wait.

Finally, the door to the bed chambers opened, and Nathaniel's wife came out.

"Congratulations Luke," she smiled. "You're a father."

Nathaniel clapped his friend on the back, and Luke asked, "Is it a boy or a girl?"

Laura smiled warmly. "Why don't you come in and see for yourself?"

Luke walked through the doorway and smiled when he saw his wife. The smile only grew wider when he saw the bundle in Anna's arms.

The new mother looked up and beamed at her husband.

"Come see our new baby, Luke. Come see our son."

Luke came closer and saw a sleeping baby boy wrapped in a blanket. Anna handed the bundle to Luke, who now held his son for the first time.

"Hello, son," he said, the word sounding odd coming from his lips. "I'm your father."

"What should we name him?" Anna asked.

"How about Allan?" replied Luke, watching the sleeping baby.

"I like that," Anna smiled.

"And how about you?" Luke asked the peacefully sleeping baby in his arms. "Do you like Allan?"

The baby snuggled closer to his father.

"I'll take that as a yes," grinned Luke. "Then Allan you shall be. Allan of Rochdale."


	2. Chapter 1

**Hello everyone! Last week was sad for Allan fans. I actually didn't watch the episode, having already read spoilers. I will no longer be watching Robin Hood, since I feel it has gone down the drain since the first two seasons. But enough of that. I would like to thank everyone for the great response I got to only the Introduction! As of today, it's gotten 52 Visitor hits, with readers from the UK, USA, Netherlands, Denmark, Canada, Iceland, Argentina, France, Sweden, Finland, and another country whose name doesn't show up in the cart. It has been favorited 3 times and is on 3 alerts. Many reviewers have called it "refreshing" and "promising", with "potential". Thank you! I really truly hope it lives up to your expectations!  
**

**A huge thanks to HighPriestessOfTheDreamWorld, for PMing me with the answers to my Allan questions. That helped a lot!**

**And more thank yous to my reviewers-**

**crabbyhopper- Hello! Allan is my favourite character too! And you were right about Rochdale! Thanks!**

**HighPriestessOfTheDreamWorld- Again, thank you!**

**lollzie- Thank you so much! That means a lot to me!**

**Lizhi Anne- Thank you! I recommend seeing through Series 2 if you can! I hope you enjoy my story!**

**numb22z- Thank you! I wanted to get the intro out before the episode came out, and I'm really glad I did.**

**Lady Marianne- Thank you! I know we share the same feelings toward BBC right now.**

**I'm glad I chose to publish the Intro when I did. Based on the reviews, I can tell many of you did what I have done in the past- unhappy with the way something plays out, we turn to fanfiction, which I truly believe is the purpose of fanfiction. But anyway, I'll get off my soapbox so you can get to the first chapter! Since this chapter is short, I will be publishing the second chapter soon too. As always, if you see any corrections, or have any ideas on what you would like to see in this story, please let me know. I really enjoy getting reviews and seeing if you like it! Again, thank you for the support so far, and enjoy!**

**Haras  
**

* * *

"Two sons!" exclaimed Luke. "I have been blessed with _two_ sons!" The man looked down at his three-year-old song. "Did you hear that Allan? You have a new baby brother!"

"The baby was born?" asked Allan, who was playing with blocks on the floor.

"Yes!" Luke smiled. "You'll have someone else to play with now!"

"He can play with me?" Allan's face lit up.

"Not right now, because he's a baby, but once he's big like you, and he can walk and talk, then you two can play together." Luke laughed. "You want to go see the baby and your mother now?"

"Yes," replied Allan. He picked himself up off the floor, and then ran to the stairs. One by one, holding the railing, Allan made his way up. Luke stayed right behind him, in case his little son fell. Reaching the top of the stairs, Allan ran to his mother's bed chamber door, jumped up to reach the doorknob, and let himself in.

"Hello Mother," he smiled as Luke followed him in the room.

"Well hello there Allan," Anna smiled back. "Have you come to see your new baby brother?"

"Yes."

Luke picked up his son. "Then up you go!" He placed Allan next to his mother and the new baby.

Allan snuggled up to his mother. "Can I see the baby?" he asked.

Anna brought a wide-eyed baby closer to him. "Here he is. Can you see him? See, he's looking at you! Allan, this is your new brother, Thomas. Thomas, this is your big brother Allan. He's going to take good care of you, aren't you Allan?"

Allan nodded his head vigorously.

"Can I hold him Mother?" Allan asked.

"You have to be very careful and be gentle, alright?"

"I will," Allan promised.

Anna placed baby Thomas in Allan's small arms.

"He's heavy," Allan commented.

Baby Thomas started to wriggle, having realized he was no longer in his mother's arms. Then a cry rang out, followed by tears.

"Oh dear," said Anna. "Here Allan, I'll take- Allan!"

Allan, in an effort to stop his baby brother's cries, had grabbed Thomas' ankles, and was now holding him upside down.

And the crying stopped.

Anna swiftly took the newborn from his older brother's hands.

"Well that's one way to calm a baby," Luke laughed. His laughing ceased with a sharp look from Anna. He coughed. "Allan," Luke said, his voice now stern. "You can't hold babies like that."

"But it made him stop," Allan replied innocently, not knowing what the problem was.

"Yes…well,…come on downstairs. We'd best let your mother get some rest," said Luke, trying to keep a smile from forming on his face.

As the door closed behind father and son, Anna let out a chuckle.

"Oh Allan," she laughed, shaking her head.


	3. Chapter 2

**Here is Chapter 2! I hope you enjoy it. I really liked writing it. I did a whole day's worth of researching to prepare for it. I know I previously said that I was going to keep this historically accurate, but after doing my research I realized how inaccurate the series is as a whole. I will still do my best to be as accurate is possible though. I also did a full character analysis on Allan to figure out reasons why he turned into the man we all know and love. It was really interesting, and I hope you like what I write. **

**Let me know of any ideas you might have to make the story better or for future chapters!**

**Please review when you're done!**

**Thanks,**

**Haras  
**

* * *

The people of Rochdale woke one morning to a beautiful day. They were thankful it was so beautiful because it was the King's birthday, and in celebration there would be a fair.

Allan, now seven, and called Allan-a-Dale instead of his full name, had been looking forward to the fair for weeks. He was the first one awake and dressed, and ate his breakfast as fast as he could. Allan waited anxiously as his mother got four-year-old Tom ready to go out. The second his family was ready, he bolted out the door, his parents calling after him.

Once at the fair, Allan tried to take in all the sights, sounds, and smells.

"Here you go Allan," said his father, giving him a small pouch with some coins. "Here's some money to spend."

"Don't spend it all in one place," his mother warned. "Save some for a lunch and supper. Don't get lost, and be careful."

"I will Mother, and thank you Father," said Allan, attaching the pouch to his belt.

"We'll meet you at the well before dusk so we can walk home together," added Anna. "Now go have fun!"

Allan ran off and soon found his group of friends. They spend the morning looking at the different performers and occasionally buying something at one of the stalls.

After buying lunch, Allan detached himself from his friends. Two of the performers had really intrigued him, and he wanted to find them and watch some more. He saw a crowd, and a burst of flames, followed by gasps and shrieking. Allan grinned, knowing he had found them.

Making his way through the crowd he was finally able to make it to the front row.

There, performing for the crowd, were two minstrels- a man and his apprentice. The older man was twirling two swords around and around. The apprentice was in the middle of a fire-eating act, and the crowd loved it. Allan cheered with the crowd, and stayed after the act was done. The minstrels then brought out a lute and a flute, and began playing them. Allan stood watching them, entranced. He had never heard anything more beautiful. The crowd continued to dwindle until only Allan remained, still entranced by the music.

The older musician looked up and saw Allan still standing there. He stopped playing and laughed.

"Oh please don't stop," said Allan.

"I take it you like our music then?" the minstrel smiled.

"Yes sir," Allan replied. "I love your instrument."

"My lute?" asked the minstrel. "Would you like to try it?"

Allan's eyes widened. "Oh no sir, I would break it."

The minstrel laughed again. "You won't. You look like a trustworthy lad. Here, come over here and sit by me."

Allan did as he was told.

"Now, there is one thing I need to know before I let you hold my instrument," the minstrel said. "You must tell me your name."

Allan. Allan-a-Dale," Allan replied.

The minstrel smiled. "Well then, Allan-a-Dale, it's nice to meet you. My name is Sam, and this is my apprentice, Matthew."

"It's very nice to meet you," said Allan politely.

"Now, I'm going to give you my lute, but first you must know how to hold it. Your right hand goes here, and your left hand does here. See? Now you try."  
Words could not describe Allan's excitement as Sam handed over the lute. Holding it seemed like the most natural thing in the world.

"Here, I will teach you to play something," said Sam. Allan caught on rather quickly, and was soon playing his first song.

Sam and Matthew clapped when he was done.

"You know Allan, I think you would make a fine minstrel!" said Sam.

"Do you really think so?" asked Allan, his eyes shining.

"Yes I do. I'd even be willing to teach you myself. Matthew here is almost ready to travel on his own. I myself don't travel anymore. I have a family now. I perform at special occasions like today, and do carpentry the rest of the time."

"So you could teach me all of those tricks you do too?" Allan asked, getting really excited. "You could teach me to eat fire, and spin swords, and do acrobatics, and juggling?"

"And dancing and how to play the lute, and singing, and buffoonery, and maybe even some conjuring and animal training," laughed Sam. "Yes, my boy, all of that. You'll be a proper minstrel when I'm done with you."

"This is great!"exclaimed Allan. "I'll just ask father tonight, and see what he says. I'll let you know as soon as I find out. Where do you live?"

Sam told Allan where his house was, and the three parted ways. Allan, so enthralled with the idea that he could become a minstrel, ran as fast as he could to the well to find his family and tell them the good news.


End file.
